History Maker Or Disciple?
06 Jun 2023
One of the most moving chapters in Scripture is at the very end of John’s gospel. Jesus has been raised from the dead and returns to be with his disciples. Yet, we know they are a mess - they have disbelieved and denied him. This does not stop a wonderful reconciliation.
John 21 begins with seven of them fishing in Galilee. It’s an unsuccessful trip. They see an unidentified figure on the shore who calls them to cast the net over the right side. It’s then that their fortunes change. Peter suddenly recognises who the man is. Rather than turning away in horror, he cannot get out the boat quick enough to get to him.
The most moving section comes next. After eating Jesus turns to Peter. I’m sure Peter had been both expecting and dreading this. What will Jesus say? He had denied him, even after claiming so strongly he wouldn’t.
It’s easy to just read what Jesus says to Peter as simply making the point that “failure isn’t final”, and that there is forgiveness available for every sin, even that of denying Christ. Of course, that is true, but there’s more going on.
It is impossible to hear what Jesus says to Peter without thinking about other times that Jesus and Peter have spoken. His first question isn’t simply “do you love me?” (although he repeats that question twice). He says first “do you love me more than these?”. Before the crucifixion Peter would have replied quickly to that question “Yes! Of course I love you more than these other disciples. Even if they fall away, I won’t.” But now Peter doesn’t even entertain the thought. He doesn’t look around, he simply looks at Jesus and says “You know that I love you”.
Peter has had to learn that real love isn’t comparative. Serving Jesus isn’t a quest for first place. The only way to be someone safe to be used by Jesus is if we love him. We must look at him only, not around at others, or inside at ourselves.
Sometimes our desire to do great things for God comes less from a true love for Jesus, and more from a Peter-like desire to be first and to achieve. When I was a young person in the 90’s there was a popular Christian band who sang a song that said “I want to be a history maker in this land, I’m gonna speak the truth to all mankind.” But Jesus doesn’t want history makers. He want disciples who love him. He’s the alpha and omega of all history.
The next thing Peter needed to know was the cost of being a disciple. Previously Jesus had predicted his denial, now he predicts his death. “Another will dress you and carry you to where you do not want to go”. Peter will be an important figure, used by Christ (everything he has wished for), but it will be accompanied by martyrdom. And this time he will not turn back.
We cannot think that there will be no cost for belonging to Jesus. Anyone who shows or tells us otherwise is preaching a secular celebrity culture to us. Choose as your hero’s men and women who model suffering well for Jesus - whether that’s in the difficulties of their personal lives, or publicly for taking a stand for Christ. Read books like “Memoirs Of An Ordinary Pastor” by Don Carson rather than grasping on every word of a mega church leader.
Finally Jesus sums everything he has said up in two words. “Follow me”. I can’t read those words without thinking of another encounter Peter had with Jesus. A while back Jesus had told Peter where he was going, and Peter had rejected it, thinking any talk of a cross was wrong. But Jesus made it clear that thought was from the devil, and that anyone who followed him should also die to self, taking up his cross. Now Jesus gives Peter a second chance. “Follow me” - the way I have gone, follow me to death and resurrection.
Peter isn’t just being forgiven and restored to usefulness by Jesus. He is re-learning the message of discipleship he has already been taught by him earlier on, but very deliberately refused to listen to. The challenge is, have we heard? Do we recognise that the most fundamental thing we must do is love Jesus, count the cost, lay down our lives and follow him - the real Jesus who died and rose, not a Jesus of our imagination?
It is clear by what comes next, and by what Peter writes in his letters later on in the Bible that he did listen and learn. “For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps”. (1 Peter 2:21)