True Fellowship
23 May 2019
A couple of weeks ago I went to a Yorkshire Gospel Partnership day conference. The speaker was Steve Midgely and it was titled “Rethinking Biblical counselling in the local church”. The day ended up being a bit broader than the title suggested, and dealt with how to raise the temperature of our spiritual conversations, and how to deepen our concern for one another in the church.
I found the whole day very helpful (you will be able to listen to there recordings on the YGP website very soon -www.ygp.org.uk/audio.asp ). Two points in particular stuck me.
The first was an illustration he used. He talked about “the miracle of the church car park”. Most people come to church after having difficult weeks, and coming from hard situations. So imagine a young family. Life is hectic, and at times they barely feel like they are holding things together. This is especially true of Sunday mornings. Breakfast time is fraught. There’s stress as everyone has to get ready to get out the door on time. Perhaps the arguments continue in the car. But then as they pull into the church car park and the car door opens they see a fellow church member. “How are things” the other church member asks. “Great” says the dad as he opens the car door, and the family get out, all smiles. And for an hour they try their hardest to look like the perfect family. It’s the miracle of the church car park that magically has dealt with all their problems and made them into the perfect family.
I think many of us can relate to that. We try and put on a show of perfection in front of everyone else at church, while deep down are struggling, and doubting, and fighting all kinds of temptations. But we work hard on the outward show, because we assume we are the only ones (or only family) who are like that. Yet it’s true for many - and so the masks can become self perpetuating. As a result the gap between who we are in church, and our struggles during the rest of the week widens. Sadly then, the very place where we should be safe to confess our sins, receive encouragement to keep going and be prayed for and supported becomes a place of pretence.
A second point he made during the day was linked to that. It was a quote he shared by the German pastor Dietrich Bonhoeffer. He’s not a theologian I would agree with on everything, but this was insightful as he reflected on the weakness of some churches-
“The final break-through to fellowship does not occur, because though they have fellowship with one another as believers and as devout people, they do not have fellowship as the undevout, as sinners. The pious fellowship permits no one to be a sinner.”
We must remember that if we are Christians there are two aspects to our identity. Yes, we belong to Christ. More than that, we are united to him. We have been justified, forgiven, set apart by him. Our lives are hidden with Christ in God. Yet, we are also still sinners (forgiven sinners). We believe, yet we can struggle to believe. We know Jesus as our Lord and Saviour - yet we still feel the pull of sin and temptation, and can become caught in it again. We are living in the real world, with all its pressures and struggles.
An important consequence of this is that we need the gospel. We didn’t just need it when we first came to Christ. We need to hear the good news right now! We need to hear it as sinners - and we need to rejoice in it just as much now as we did in the past. Never think that the gospel is now just for those outside the church. We never move on from the gospel.
We also need each other. In our sins and struggles and joys and sorrows. As we gather together we need to be able to encourage one another on, and to pray for one another, and to apply the gospel to each others lives. This won’t happen if we appear like we don’t need it!
How do we do that practically? It’s daunting to have deep personal conversations. I know that as much as anyone! But there are some ways we can help each other with this.
Try and move beyond the small talk. Don’t just ask “how are you” after the service and expect the answer “fine”. Perhaps try and share where you struggle to believe or apply a point made in the sermon, or ask others how they do it. In home groups in particular don’t just race over the application questions, but spend time discussing how we can help each other to believe and apply God’s word. In prayer time perhaps begin to share for prayer what we really need - greater faith to believe God’s promises, his strength to say no to temptation, or an assurance of his love.